Please understand that everything in this blog will include only the honest truth about the journey I shall undertake to find my birth parents. I will share some feelings and thoughts with you that may be confronting, but if I am going to start this blog I want it to be genuine. I would never change the path I have been on and believe that I have been given every opportunity in life (one that my birth parents could not give me).
I am going to start right at the beginning. At three months old I began a journey with my family (at the time strangers). While I never really knew what was happening it was set that my life was going to be both challenging and rewarding. I was adopted into a loving family with two older brothers (who were also adopted) and later on a sister (who was fostered).
I remember this one night in particular ( I was probably 9 years old) I wanted answers. I believe at this time in primary school we were looking at where we came from and our cultures/background. During this period of time I never really had any answers to these questions besides providing answers based on my (adoptive) parents history. This began to stir thoughts in my head. I began to question why I was here, not on earth but here with a family who could never really understand what life was like for a little Asian girl with no link to her past. I guess you could say I felt a sense of disconnection with my family and a bit lost. I spoke to my (adoptive) mum and I remember seeing her cry as she could not give me the answers I wanted nor could she truly understand what I was going through. Mum could only hear the disheartened pain in my voice and see the sadness in my body language.
Over the last 5 years I have probably written an application more than 10 times in order to search for my birth parents but I never get to the point of sending off my application. I am not sure why this occurs but I am hoping that this time will be different.
I have titled my blog ‘Two Pages Pending’ the reason behind the title is that I have two pages of information in relation to my birth parents and while there are only two pages I am hoping that along this journey I am going to turn those two pages into something much larger.
The next step of this process is to fill out a number of application forms and forward them to NSW Family and Community Services. Eastern Social Welfare Society require that I go through an agency in order to access more information.
I am nervous, scared and excited to embark on this new chapter. I am most definitely privileged to share my story with you. I hope you enjoy reading my blog and if you have any questions or would like to contact me please leave a comment below.